Window Into My Reality

Well, we had a good Mother's Day. Liston and his girlfriend, me and Justin, our oldest half-sister Glenda, all took Mom to dinner at a local restaurant. Good food, good company. The only glitch in the day was that my sister Sara wasn't able to get her little boy alone for the day, the jerk of a father insisted that they stay at the exchange place. Which was just up the road from where we were all at. So when we were done, we all motored up there to see them. Well, ex-jerk didn't like that so he took their son and left. So I whipped out my camcorder and taped the leavetakings. Ex-jerk doesn't know that. But if she ever needs it to prove that her son would rather be with her, she'll have it. Talk about heartbreaking.

Well, that went well. Justin backed out on me at the last minute. So I went by myself. Yes, Jean-Luc, it is sad that it is needed. I never would have thought that I'd be in a domestically violent relationship. It's really rather depressing, although the underactive thyroid doesn't help with that at all. These are the scratches he gave me the other morning. He hasn't hit me. Yet. But if this continues, it's only a matter of time. I want to see him get the help he needs. In the mean time, I'm going to get the help I need. This is not the Justin I fell in love with. Even my best friend Tempy agrees that this isn't "our" Justin. We want him back. I want him back. :'( Of course, I also want to shake the shit out of him. But more violence isn't the answer.

Well, the best news is that Justin has a job! It's not exactly "new" job, he's gone back to work at the Daily as a pressman. Which unfortunately means that he's on nightshift while I'm on days ... part of me says, BOOOO!!! .... Part of me says, Thank you Jesus! It's a job, which means that there's going to be more money coming into the household again, and since they're paying him more than when he left, it's not that big of a paydrop...although they're not paying him what he's worth, but then they never do. We start couples counseling tomorrow night...if he doesn't back out. He's a stubborn proud man who wants to fix his own problems, but we've been living together for 2 years now and instead of his temper getting better, each episode - however sporadic - is getting worse. I can relate as I used to have a very bad temper myself, I was horrible. I realize that I've got a good 10 years on him, but I was around his ...