Skip to main content

What was I expecting?

I should have known better. Really, I should have.

I wrote a poem today, it's scheduled to be posted on my poetry site on the 15th. It was written inspired by a one-word prophetic word given to me by someone who was a friend at the time, and the memory that one-word word sparked.

Good old Paigey.

Our friendship did not end on good terms, though if she were honest, it was much needed and past due. We are both much healthier without each other. I was as much it the wrong when it came to the end...I was being a bitch...and so was she. She'll never admit it, she never could adit when she was wrong...unless you were someone important...but that is neither here nor there.

I'm guessing that she's still as pissed at me as I am at here. I'll admit it. I can't think of her without still being angry. I know I should just let it go and forgive, so I don't become more bitter than I already am.

Anyway, I sent this poem to her because I thought she'd appreciate knowng that the one-word word wasn't in vain. I now I shared the story with her, but this poem was evidence that there was more to it than just that. Heck, it ecouraged me! Of course, I'm encouraged just to be writing again. I'm hoping this means the writer's block is over.

She messagd me back with "Very nice".

Very nice?

Uhm...duh.

Talk about cool politeness!!

I'm not sure what I was looking for, to be honest. More than a two word response. Maybe testing the waters to open some dialogue. I do regret my harsh and angry words at our parting...via MySpace of all places! I keep wanting to message her on FB and ask her if she thinks we can be friends there...but I can't. I know this. I'm better of without her. I'm happier without her. But it's like her friendship was an addiction. I see her on there, friends with some o my friends - we can't help but overlap. All chipper and gushy...and part of me wants that back. The other part laughs, is disgusted with both my weakness and what I view as her fakeness (I've seen the 'behind closed doors' Paige. Maybe she's changed...but I doubt it.

BTW - It's a great little poem.

Comments

Jean-Luc Picard said…
With the amount you've been writing, I would say your block is over.
Ciera said…
I am hoping so!!!!

Popular posts from this blog

My Brother's Question and Answer Segment

As you all know from yesterday's post and comments, my brother slammed me on a few of my survey answers. I've left his questions/comments in black and my answers in blue. Letter: Q Now, I wonder why you would like the letter Q. I wonder what Jean-Luc REALLY thinks about that? Uhm---it's the only Star Trek related letter. :P Any comment Jean-Luc?? Body Part on Opposite sex: smile Age you wanna lose your Virginity: How old am I now? LOL Can these two answers really correspond? It sounds to me like you might be lying in one of these. What???? Sex doesn't start with a smile? Besides....you should see his smile. Strawberry or Watermelon: watermelon What! Watermelon! You...You... TRAITOR! :P Kiss or Hug: both Now, this answer seems to correspond well with both your answers in the above mentioned two questions. And your point is? Rap or Punk: rap You really like rap? Uhm...I think TobyMac counts as rap and I like a few of his songs. I also like hiphop. Wanna see me dance with ...

Weekenders!!!

It's that time again. For Michele's weekend Meet-n-Greet. Some frown, but others gleefully play. Here's a question for all who visit here, whether on your own or from Michele's: Last night during a prayer meeting, I had a memory flash through my mind. More like the shadow of the memory. I was five years old or younger and I was begging my father for a peanut butter cake. I really wanted one, and even though I was interupting the adult conversation and probably being a regular brat...my Dad quit what he was doing to search for a recipe for a peanut butter cake...uhm, I don't think he ever found one so he made me a chocolate one with peanut butter frosting. This is probably the best memory I have of my father. So - what is your favorite childhood memory?????

Shock and Awe

It is a strange thing. How someone can say, "I'm sorry, please forgive me" and still manage to correct you all at once...it is truly amazing to me. I was shocked that this person actually admitted to being wrong, and at the same time, I was ashamed for wanting it. But it got me to thinking. About Repentance and Forgiveness...how once they have happened...there is healing and restoration. I haven't completely researched it yet, but the verses I've peaked at in James make me think I'm not far off. I wonder, just as one person sinning can spoil others...can one person repenting turn others to repentance? Hmm.... Of course, as in any relationship situation...it helps to know the whole story. Why do we do that, I wonder? Close up and not share what is going on, I mean. I know that sometimes, there are things that hurt too deep to share right away. It is frustrating. Thanksgiving looks to be a dismal day so far. I'm not about ready to invite myself to any...