Sigh. Will I never learn? I just had a fight with my bestest friend, 5 minutes before prayer meeting, which she's supposed to lead. So - she's going into prayer pissed at me...I'm not even there at all...and I'm furious myself. But as usual, It's all my fault. It always is, right? I should have just kept my stupid mouth shut when she started talking about a mutual friend instead of sharing my thoughts about the church's attitude toward her. Does this woman need to grow up in a few things - yes, I don't deny that. But I think sometimes "tough love" can do more damage than good sometimes. That's just my opinion as I've been on the receiving end of this "tough love" and have had it totally mess me up for a while...like the time I was told of by a pastors whose church I was thinking of joining. You don't lift someone up by beating them into the ground. Do we need to not give negative attention to negative behavior? Absolutely...then why do we in prayer and call it ok? Were the words ok? Yes. This woman needs to have a more stable daily walk. Does she need to have the pastor's wife tone of voice cutting her down in a public setting while praying? I don't think so. Of course, this is just from my viewpoint...which I freely admit isn't always "right on"...so maybe I"m just over reacting. Of course. I was just kicked out of my bestest friends house...for refusing to share all this. It turned that way when I said, "you've yelled at me so many times for gossipping..." I never got to finish as she said to get out of her house. Well, she has. And here she is twisting my arm to share something I don't want to share. Perhaps I am the warped one after all.
We all see the world differently, sometimes correctly, sometimes flawed. This is my slice of reality, My Secret Place...where I come to vent, to imagine and to muse, to ramble on about my trials large and small...amongst people who accept me with all my flaws and foibles...and read anyways.
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