Sunday, August 31, 2008


I'm a little calmer today. Not by much.

That asshole I was stupid enough to give my virginity to will not leave me alone. He's requested me as a friend on "Tagged"....yeah, ok, right....It's too little too late....far too late to try to be my friend.

Steven: GO AWAY!!!!

I have a new boyfriend. Justin's nicer, kinder, gentler....he's more fun to be with...treats me with respect. I fall a little more in love with him each day.

Ok, I'm going to bed. I fell at work tonight and am just a little achy in spots.

Saturday, August 30, 2008


posts are going to be thin for a while....few and far between.

there's been lines drawn since I've gotten a boyfriend [he's for real too!] and so I will no longer be using the house computer. Don't want to run up the electric bill and stuff, especially since the computer belongs to Mother and Liston ~ even though I've been the one paying the internet. which I'll no longer be doing.

have to get to bed.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

I have....

I have a boyfriend.

Not sure how serious it is yet, but so far it's more real than the last one.

Want to hear more?

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Once in a While

Every once in a while, I almost think I have an interesting life. Not often, just once in a while.

Sunday morning, like, between 4 and 5 am, I get home from putting the Sunday paper together...I flip on the computer, you know, check email and log onto Yahoo Messenger so I can have my weekly chat with Jean-Luc and there was an Add Request...from my EX of all people! It's been almost 2 years since we've even talked...and I've only seen him in passing a handfull of times. Curious, I decide to add him just because I want to see what he wants. Turns out - he just wanted sex. {eyeball roll} Apparently his chicky that he left me for, left him! It couldn't have happened to a nicer fella. After laughing my ass of, I told him - no, I'm not that lonely. Ever!

This after Saturday night on the inserter, Justin yakking my ear off even though there was a coworker in between us. Justin said something to me, that just irritated me...I don't even remember what it was now, but it was after the wide-load conversation, so I know it wasn't that....but I said to the coworker inbetween us that I'd smack Justin but he'd probably like it...which is when coworker Steve [not to be confused with the Ex] 'yeah, I already think he's got a crush on you' which I reply, 'I've been wondering that myself..........Can you blaim him? I am kinda cute!' But that would explain why he so often puts his foot in his mouth around me.

Like the wide load comment. Months ago he said something as I passed by, then asked if I had heard him. I hadn't because my mind was somewhere else. He wasn't going to tell me, but I drug it out of him. He had made a comment about a 'wide load passing through' or something like that. I gave him a sound yelling at and if I could have gotten closer I'd have taken his head off. I know I'm a wide woman, but it's not like I need the reminder! And it didn't end there...just this past Saturday night, he was telling me how tempy had brought that comment up. ???? So, I yelled at him again [I really think he likes seeing me that animated] and asked tempy about it. Apparently she had been trying to get it through to him that sometimes he says stupid that comment. I told her that I didn't think it had gotten through to him.

But I added him to my MySpace friends anyway.

Ah well, I've got to rescue my princess from her dungeon because she has a wedding to go to in a bit...and I'll have to come up with a name for her you have any idea how hard that is?!

That and brother and I are watching Star Trek First Contact so I'm distracted that way too.

Later! :)

Saturday, August 09, 2008

Can Fish Drown?

If a fish falls out of the water...does it drown on air? I don't know, but I do know that if the aquarium is too crowded...then the fish can drown right in the water. What do you think?

Believe it or not - but this question has spawned something of a war at work...and it's not pretty. Some people just have to be right no matter what the cost.

I found a neat's full of quotes. Which is good because I was looking for my favorite by Emily Dickenson..."They say that God is everywhere, and yet we always think of Him as somewhat of a recluse." I've already posted it on my MySpace blog, and I'll probably post more there since it's not my "real" blog --- shhhhhh --- don't tell!

Off for some sleep. :)

Monday, August 04, 2008

When did I say that?

My sister-in-law Liz called last night and wanted someone to ride along with her to WalMart. Well, I was bored and like spending time with her once in a while. We talked about different family issues going on right now. From Liston's attraction, to Duane's possible upcoming leg amputation {Duane's her hubby}. Somewhere in there, our pasts came up. Before marrying my brother, she had a string of lovers...while I didn't even have sex until I was almost the heart of us, we're really not that different, though I don't know she'd ever see it. Anyway, she made a comment that sometimes she wished that she was more like, dumb-ass that I am, I ask her exactly how she meant that. Her reply? "You've never wanted a steady relationship."


When have I ever said that?!?!?!?!?!

I would LOVE to find a man who loves me...who wants to know the woman inside as much as much as he wants to fuck the outside woman...just because I haven't found that man, doesn't mean I don't want that relationship. I'm just not willing to lower certain standards. I am 32 years old, and I'm sorry I refuse to hitch up with the first man who sniffs around...and yes, if I get a hint that all he wants is sex, I'll drop him like a hotcake b/c I don't have time for games. Nor do I have the patience. I want someone who's going to be responsible. And I want someone who is willing to let me be the woman God created me to be. Of course, I know that I will have to give the same in return, and that I'll have to sacrifice my own desires once in a while. I'm not stupid. Niave maybe, but not stupid. While there are times when all I want is a really good roll in the hay...those times haven't always been at the same time that I've got some hound dog sniffing around and I've been safe from the bad decisions that I made with Steve...and I'm smart enough to know that it's God protection. I might not always like it at the time, but afterwards...I've been like..."Wow, I was that close to screwing up again, and God protected me. Even from myself!"

I am honest enough to admit that I'm pretty skittish right now about any guy...with one exception but he lives in England. Between the 50 year old from the 4th of July, and my own brother...I just feel like a piece of meat. I'm more than that. I'm a crazy zany woman with a love of books and chocolate who is just beginning to rediscover her writing voice. I like to sleep late when I can, and I like listening to the thunder in the distance [it's when it's directly overhead that I begin to not like it as much!]. And I'd really like to find a guy who wants to find that out. I'm also high-strung, spend a lot of time in the realm of make-believe {hello? I'm a writer!} and sometimes have trouble controlling my fiery temper - so my imaginary man is also going to have to be a little patient....and calm...and gentle.

Maybe that's my problem. I want too much.

Saturday, August 02, 2008

Google Meme

Mimi had a MeMe posted just the other day. I found her through Jean-Luc who did the meme as well...I didn't get tagged by him because he doesn't tag people, but I felt like doing it anyways. Because I'm bored I guess.

What you do, is "google" your name followed by the word needs and see what pops up. All I got for Ciera was a bunch of car stuff, nothing interesting. I'm not going to tag anyone, but feel free to go ahead and do it anyways.

Here's a few I got when I googled my real name. I'm placing my screen name in it's place though...just because I feel like it!

1. Ciera Needs Somebody to Love. {well - duh! I've been saying this for years!}
2. Ciera needs You! {Yes you! Now quit looking so surprised and get over here!}
3. Ciera needs a Band. {I do? Does that come with groupies?}
4. Ciera needs help with a little securities fraud. {sounds ugly}
5. Ciera needs your help. {See #2}
6. Ciera does not self-preserve. {that doesn't sound good!}
7. Gothic America - Ciera needs help gonig downhill. {All I need is a good push}
8. Ciera needs to get a job! {I like the one I have thank you very much!}
9. I have a baby Ciera! Need help? {not if you're the one with the baby..unless you're asking for my help....}
10. Ciera needs to go ride her bike. {if I had one, I think I would...though I would wait until daylight...}

Ah, that brightens my day already! Kind ofl ike this random picture off our computer. Enjoy!



Friday, August 01, 2008


Well, that was actually a rather boring birthday. I slept most of it away, one of the curses/blessings of working nightshift I geuss. No cake, no cards, although I can't complain too much as there were a few well-wishers. Tempy sang to me half a dozen times, Creative Services put in a happy ad for me. I didn't explode, which is always a good thing! Caught myself wanting to cry too many times to count...that entire single and no kids thing still hurts.

But, I survived. That's what counts!
Work is same old drama. Rob was fired and so Christina is pouting. Tempy is the new supervisor, so I guess she's not going to be in the pressroom as much anymore. And actually, there's nothing much else interesting to tell there.
I guess I'm in a boring mundane stretch. Which is ok. Better than one crisis after another!
I have to go write a Zion post.
Want to hear something crazy? Sure you do, or you wouldn't be reading my blog in the first place. Anyway, I've been thinking alot on my new hero blog and I'm actually thinking there's something to if I gave it a chance, it could mutate into an actual novel. Of course, there'd be a few changes, the mixed universe would be out {sorry Jean-Luc, I'd have to write you out for that} and I'd probably leave Earth out of it completely, though I'm not sure about that yet, but that's the direction I would be leaning if I were to do it. It's still in the concept phase, but even if I leave it as a blog, it's still a lot of fun to think on.
Ok, now I'm going to go work on my other post! :)