Window Into My Reality

So, one of the things I've done in the name of love since joining with Justin has been learning how to play Halo Wars on the Xbox.  It's not really my thing.  I prefer playing games like Hexic, or Bejeweled Blitz.  The occasional racing game because I suck at driving anything on a game console - part of my fun is how many times I can crash it during the course of the race lol! What I have learned from playing Halo Wars is interesting though.  For those of you who don't know, it's a war game in which you are in charge of commanding the army.  You can play against the computer, or actual people courtesy of Xbox Live.  Personally - I've found that I'm not a very good player on my own, I play better as part of a team.  I'm better at implementing other's strategies rather than coming up with them on my own.  I'm also not very good at changing strategies mid-game...though I'm learning.  And I've learned that I don't like losing...ok, nobody ...

Well, that went well. Justin backed out on me at the last minute. So I went by myself. Yes, Jean-Luc, it is sad that it is needed. I never would have thought that I'd be in a domestically violent relationship. It's really rather depressing, although the underactive thyroid doesn't help with that at all. These are the scratches he gave me the other morning. He hasn't hit me. Yet. But if this continues, it's only a matter of time. I want to see him get the help he needs. In the mean time, I'm going to get the help I need. This is not the Justin I fell in love with. Even my best friend Tempy agrees that this isn't "our" Justin. We want him back. I want him back. :'( Of course, I also want to shake the shit out of him. But more violence isn't the answer.

I am so blessed. Sometimes I have no idea. Right now, Justin and I have $2 to our name, I need girlie supplies, we need TP and food...but I have a man who is tenderhearted and I can't begin to tell you how much that means to me. He trusts me enough to let me see his tears. Justin's friend Mo was up for a week, and spent the entire time with us. It was wierd at first, since I didn't know Mo that well, but once the ice was broken things were fine. We chatted and played Runescape while Justin was at work and. The only glitch in it all was that I was ignored a lot when Justin was home. I took it well, after all this is his best friend and he never gets to see him, so I womaned up and let him have his fun time with his friend. After all, Mo was only going to be here for a week. And he did go home today, Justin took him over there to his grandma's...spent too much time there given that he still had to come home and get sleep before he goes into work, but he was trying to get ...

Life has been happening recently. So much so that I just haven't had time to blog. Or answer long emails. Justin and I have been spending a lot of time together in the month we've been dating. I guess we must like each other a little bit. I have to have gallbladder surgery next month, the 13th. I'll probably spend time then catching up wth you all since I won't be able to even drive for the 1st week after the surgery. NOOO!!!! I'll be housebound!!! HELP!!!!!!!! Christina has been giving me attitude for about the past two weeks at work. No reason I can think of, except that I'm happy in life and excelling at work and is probably jealous. She so needs to grow up!! alright, off to do something somewhere...