Window Into My Reality

Life has been happening recently. So much so that I just haven't had time to blog. Or answer long emails. Justin and I have been spending a lot of time together in the month we've been dating. I guess we must like each other a little bit. I have to have gallbladder surgery next month, the 13th. I'll probably spend time then catching up wth you all since I won't be able to even drive for the 1st week after the surgery. NOOO!!!! I'll be housebound!!! HELP!!!!!!!! Christina has been giving me attitude for about the past two weeks at work. No reason I can think of, except that I'm happy in life and excelling at work and is probably jealous. She so needs to grow up!! alright, off to do something somewhere...

It's truly spellbinding, how I've spent my two days off. Ok, not really, but I really wish it had been. Ok. Sunday: got off work at 3:30...went home, read just a little bit and was soon out...for most of the entire day. I did go to the library in the evening, but I even went to bed early that night. So. Monday: Up way too early. Finished reading Dominion by Randy Alcorn. Chatted with a friend. Ran some errands. Got Mom's van checked out, learned that it was a bad tire...which of course he didn't even have and he had to order them [2] and was told to drive it as little as possible. Didn't quite make that, and the tire went flat [finally?] while I was still out running errands. Couldn't find Liston to come help, so I had to go beg some help off of Kost tires. They changed the tire and put on the spare and didn't even charge me for it. Am now at Mom's. Again. Until who knows when. Sigh.

I over oiled my car. I didn't mean to...honest...But my oil light flickered on, and it had that sound that it always has when it needs oil and I've let it get a little too low. Well, I didn't actually check the dipstick...and just put oil in. And then left the oil cap OFF and drove almost 25 miles...had oil everywhere and I do mean everywhere...it was running down the front bumper. So, thinking that like the last time I did this [over a year ago] that I had lost all my oil, once I found my cap [it was right where I left it] I put more oil in. And then my car wouldn't run right...sluggish...and now it just won't start. I thought for sure I had blown the engine. But no...I had TOO much oil in it. So it sits in front of my boss's house...waiting for someone with the right tool to pull the spark plugs and the time. And the knowledge...b/c Jerry spent hours working on a part that my car doesn't even have...????...Lord only knows what he's done to it...

Short lived trip that was. Yep, the Glory Girls trip is off again. Probably for good this time. Not that anyone is telling me what is going on. I go out to my mother's for a few days to babysit the dogs and all sorts of crap happens. I'm not even sure if there is a group called 'the Glory Girls' anymore! Sheesh! Speaking of Mom's - I'm stranded there again. Flat tire this time, so I should only be here long enough for the garages to open on Monday so that I can get the tire fixed. I ought to get around to getting my spare fixed as well so that next time I have a flat, I can just throw that baby on...or get some guys to do that for me! The guys at the little store I had to stop at would have done that in a heart beat...if I'd had a working spare! So I'm sitting her at Mom's, having been woke up waaaay too early for having had to help with the Sunday paper last night...during which there had been a thunderstorm so loud that I could hear the thunder abo...

.............and my car won't start. I could just cry. Paige is taking me to Walmart tonight to buy a car battery, since mine is deader than dead. Will let you all know how that works out. I just want my car back...I want to be able to come and go as I please. :(

The check is no longer in the mail----it is in my hand!!!!!!!!!! Wow---that really was quick...it was mailed Friday and I had it in the mail on Monday????????? That never happens!!!!! Maybe God sped the post office up a little bit?????? Just for me?????? :D

So far so good. I was given a sum of money a little while ago that was almost a months rent...so since the IRS website "where's my refund?" said that my refund was mailed today..I used that money towards my rent. So I don't have to move. And when my refund comes---that along with what I'll have from my paychecks --- I'll be able to get my car back! Sigh-----the check is in the mail!!!!! we're making a little headway on the budget too so that I can prevent this from happening again!

I might not have to move. Housing Authority told me today that if I could come up with a months rent by tomorrow...and submit a written payment plan...then the eviction process would stop. this would be good because the spot at Mom's didn't get cleaned out in time [she had a lot of stuff in that room]. AND if my income tax return comes...then I'll be able to get my car back too. please Jesus...please??? alms for the poor anyone...LOL... I'll keep you all updated. Diana and I have been going over my finances and we'll probably have me on a budget before all is said and done!

Exile...homecoming...??? Feels more like exile to me. Unless $1150 and some odd cents doesn't miraculously appear by March 2nd...I will have to move back in with my Mom. $585 is for rent, $565 is for my car. I only have $400---and that won't cover both let alone one! I don't know what else to do. I don't like it, but can see no other alternative. Where is my miracle??? Probably in the same place as my imaginary husband! Non-existant???? Lord?!?!?!

But hopefully it won't be much longer before I have it back. Hopefully! All that was left on Tuesday was the replacement headlight housing unit, which hadn't come in yet. Wonder if it made it through the foot of snow we got?! It's two toned now...the hood and fender are a deeper shade of blue now! It's even had an oil change! It probably is wishing I had hit the deer sooner! Tired of being stranded at Mom's. Though I know she loves me and loves the company. She doesn't have to work until next Wednesday, so she's letting me take the van home this weekend---so I get to run around my apartment naked! and sleep in my own bed!!! Wonder if I'll get to keep it until Wednesday? I'm off for now. ps - I'm on a roll with my Trek story cuz I put up another. This one will have to hold you a little longer Jean-Luc :)

I did something today that I would never have been able to do in town, so there are some benefits to country living...I walked the dogs in my pajama's! And as I was standing in the middle of the dirt road...arms stretched wide so one dog could be on one side of the road while the other dog was on the opposite side...in my purple pajama bottoms...with my coat barely covering my aqua colored nightgown and my beige sweater....nothing matching colorwise...and my knitted stocking cap over my uncombed hair.....I had the thought-----"oh my gosh, I look like a fruitcake!" At least there was no one to see this humilating moment!!! I just tell the world about it here!!! I just want to go home!!!!! But I can't until my car is fixed and paid for --- $565.64

There will be no picture with this post!!! LOL!! Another reason why I like having my own place is that I can run around my apartment naked as the day I was born if I want to!! This comment comes from a conversation with my brother Liston....I was complaining becuase he was sitting on Mom's couch in this clothes he worn for work...which happens to be a farm job... so needless to say, there was some manure on his jeans....and he smelled like a bran. I was objecting because there is only one spot to sit on the couch and he was in it....the same spot I had sat in the night before. So he protests right back saying, "Like you never sit down in your work clothes! What do you do, come home from work and run around naked?" Who told on me!?!? LOL!!!

I want my life back. I want my car fixed so I can come and go as I please...and sleep in my bed. I'd like to be able to keep my apartment. It's not much, as can be seen in this photo of one of the corners of my little home. But it's mine. I'd also like my back to stop hurting! I've been taking my mother's darvocets to keep the pain away...which makes me a little high....but I can still work...which is the entire idea.

I am somewhat recovered from my pity party from yesterday. Somewhat. I went home from church yesterday and slept....all the rest of the day. Woke up about midnight but decided to stay in bed. Got up about 6 this morning, knowing that my sleep schedule is now messed up again. The cost for most of the repairs for my car is at $150. This will be going up once the totals for the inspection [which was past due] are added. I'll find that out tomorrow. Still - that's not a bad price, especially since I hit it so hard! Nothing runs like a deer - until it gets in my way!!! Of course, I don't quite have the money to fix it...it'd be so nice to have that kind of money just laying around! {I'd have gone to England myself a long time ago if that were so!} But, like some people have mentioned, our income taxes will be coming in shortly, or it should once we get all of our W2's! I'll have to catch up on rent some other way. Like I said to Pastor Sharon a little while ago.....

Edge-On Galaxy NGC 5866 taken by the Hubble Telescope. Sigh. A space picture to cheer me up. My sad little car needs: ~ radiator ~ grill ~ fender ~ hood ~ head light fixture ~ and it needs the brackets that hold the radiator pulled forward so that the radiator will sit where it's supposed to and not up against the shifting lever. I haven't a clue how much this will cost, and whether it will be feasible to fix. It's all very depressing...and yet....since crazy stuff like this has been happening ever since I recommitted my life to Christ...I am rather amused. Strange girl! I have to get some some sleep...it's been rough again ever since I hit this deer. ggrrr.....

Yesterday morning, about quarter to 4, I creamed a deer with my car. Plowed the thing right down as it ran into my path. I was driving Russ home before coming up to drop Mom's paper off, and came around this curve and there was this deer standing in the opposite lane...until I saw it, then it darted my way. Not a pretty picture----- the hood of the car is buckled, the area around my one working headlight was demolished [although the light still works fine] my door is dent so that it won't open all the way, it's a standard transmission and it was stuck in neutral [the clutch wouldn't pop back up], and I'm quite certain it was leaking something from underneathe. Sigh. Not looking good for the Geo :( And yes, I was SO wasteful and just let the deer lay. I don't do venison. I don't like the taste. Ew. Give me beef anyday. Ok. Have to go and get myself home so I can sleep. I didn't get much after hitting the deer as I had phone calls to make.