Window Into My Reality

I am so not happy right now. Months ago, almost a year ago, I let a couple of friends of mine put their car in my name. Title, Registration, and it's on my insurance. So at the end of each month, I have to get a check from them to cover their portion of the insurance. I was told on Monday that I could pick it up on Tuesday...but when I called Tuesday afternoon, I was told that the husband hadn't left the check. Pardon my language, but WTF???? I am at the mercy of other people right now, and don't know when I'll get back home since I'm spending today at Mom's since she needs her van today. The insurance withdrawal stands a good chance of bouncing now. I was a little immature and hung up the phone upon hearing this news, and there awaits me an email in my Inbox as I type this, which I will read before I publish this post. I mean, it's not like this is a surprise expense to them. It's the same amount at the same time of month. I shouldn't have to come b...

I am somewhat recovered from my pity party from yesterday. Somewhat. I went home from church yesterday and slept....all the rest of the day. Woke up about midnight but decided to stay in bed. Got up about 6 this morning, knowing that my sleep schedule is now messed up again. The cost for most of the repairs for my car is at $150. This will be going up once the totals for the inspection [which was past due] are added. I'll find that out tomorrow. Still - that's not a bad price, especially since I hit it so hard! Nothing runs like a deer - until it gets in my way!!! Of course, I don't quite have the money to fix it...it'd be so nice to have that kind of money just laying around! {I'd have gone to England myself a long time ago if that were so!} But, like some people have mentioned, our income taxes will be coming in shortly, or it should once we get all of our W2's! I'll have to catch up on rent some other way. Like I said to Pastor Sharon a little while ago.....

Back in August, I awoke one morning to a sad revelation: everyone in my life has people, things ahead of me on their list of priorities. Some things I can deal with: like spouses and kids. Other things were just plain stupid {I happen to hate a certain person's dump truck with a passion}. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it did make me sad. It still does. And today, another thing that I've realized is that for some reason....I'm just not good enough. I'm not good enough to be a constant friend, just good enough to fill in as a substitute when she's fighting with her friend at work. I'm not good enough for a real relationship, but good enough for a roll in the hay. I'm not good enough to be in church leadership, but am good enough to prepare communion [well, that might have changed, I haven't done that for months]. I might be good enough to be a supervisor at work---someday. I'm not good enough to cross the ocean for, just good enough to b...

The Keys to Your Heart You are attracted to good manners and elegance. In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved. You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring. You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please. Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred. In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily. What Are The Keys To Your Heart? Side note: I'm a MySpacer now!

Edge-On Galaxy NGC 5866 taken by the Hubble Telescope. Sigh. A space picture to cheer me up. My sad little car needs: ~ radiator ~ grill ~ fender ~ hood ~ head light fixture ~ and it needs the brackets that hold the radiator pulled forward so that the radiator will sit where it's supposed to and not up against the shifting lever. I haven't a clue how much this will cost, and whether it will be feasible to fix. It's all very depressing...and yet....since crazy stuff like this has been happening ever since I recommitted my life to Christ...I am rather amused. Strange girl! I have to get some some sleep...it's been rough again ever since I hit this deer. ggrrr.....

Yesterday morning, about quarter to 4, I creamed a deer with my car. Plowed the thing right down as it ran into my path. I was driving Russ home before coming up to drop Mom's paper off, and came around this curve and there was this deer standing in the opposite lane...until I saw it, then it darted my way. Not a pretty picture----- the hood of the car is buckled, the area around my one working headlight was demolished [although the light still works fine] my door is dent so that it won't open all the way, it's a standard transmission and it was stuck in neutral [the clutch wouldn't pop back up], and I'm quite certain it was leaking something from underneathe. Sigh. Not looking good for the Geo :( And yes, I was SO wasteful and just let the deer lay. I don't do venison. I don't like the taste. Ew. Give me beef anyday. Ok. Have to go and get myself home so I can sleep. I didn't get much after hitting the deer as I had phone calls to make.

We'll see how long this lasts, but ------- Bob is back.