Yes Jean-Luc, The Visitation is a favorite book of mine. While it is fiction and not Gospel...there's a lot of Gospel truth in the book.
The scene: a hardware store, a few days after the angel sitings have started and the crucifix started weeping.
The players: Travis Jordan and the owner, Matt Kiley.
Matt was a Vietnam vet who came home paralyzed. Of course, people were urging him to go down to the Catholic church to touch the crucifix to be healed of his disability. Matt's a little disgruntled with it all. "Like all I have to do is look up at that crucifix and believe, and that'll do it." A little later on, he says to Trav - "Funny. I made some friends at the VA hospital, I've met some other folks in wheelchairs, and we got along fine. They never told me to go down and look at some crucifix or wash in some special kind of water or say some kind of magic prayer words. It's always the walkers who know what you need."
Now - do not get me wrong. I believe that God heals in strange and miraculous ways. It's all throughout the Bible, and even in today He has not changed. I also believe that God's goal is to have everyone healed...It's what Jesus did when He walked on this earth. That isn't the point of this paragraph or my thoughts.
It seems that it's always the healthy that knows what the sick person needs. Sometimes, this is true as that healthy person has been there and done that. But how many times is the person who is healthy never had a physical ailment? They've never known disability. They've never known disillusionment. They've never endured the silence of God. So then - who are they really to counsel, judge, criticize, those who are sick, those who are bitter, heartbroken. If you've never been in that spot...how can you know what they're really truly going through? And how can you know the answer?
And who are they to question what God is up to? Exodus 4:11 - So the Lord said to him, "Who has made man's mouth? Or who makes the mute, the deaf, the seeing, or the blind? Have not I, the Lord?" In no way am I saying that God wishes ill on His creation. BUT - what if there's a point to all the suffering? To movitate the Church to good works. Sometimes to participate in miraculous healings...and sometimes to just help that person endure their tribulation. To encourage them that they're going to make it.
I know that there are many people who would view me as a backsliding Christian. I've even joked about it. They would tell me that all I need is to read my bible and pray and have a quiet time with God everyday. There's nothing wrong with that and I used to do it all the time. I am just tired and God understands this. I have read scripture to the point where I've memorized the gist and sometimes the words. I work mainly by myself during the week - above the sounds of the machines all I have is quiet....not to mention the hours alone I have in the trailer when Justin is at work. My faith has become something between me and Him and right now intruders [and well meaning idiots] aren't welcome.
There may come a day when this quiet volcano erupts within me and I walk in His power and presence in greater measure than I once did - but the timing is up to Him. I'm not going to force it...and no one else is going to either. Since moving into the trailer, I've already sensed a difference in me. I can't explain it. I just know that although the church brands me a sinner for not standing in front of a crowd and getting a legal document ---- I have a peace about this relationship and this move. And I know that God's hand is on my life.
Hmm, I've been long winded the past couple of days. Sorry! This is what happens when I read books and think deep thoughts! lol