Window Into My Reality

So, we called in to work today...again! This makes about 12 1/2 points for Justin and 11 for me. When we hit 15 we're terminated. I'm a little worried about Justin. I have another job all lined up, though I won't give notice until I'm sure I'm signed on. I don't know why Justin is calling off though...I call if he does, because I don't trust him alone with the puppy Jacalyn...he has a tendancy to not be in control of himself when he gets mad or frustrated...and the last time I left them alone, for an hour and a half, they somehow managed to get doggy poo on our ceiling!!! He still won't tell me how that happened, though I know it had something to do with walking her on the treadmill. Which she doesn't like. !!!! An hour and a half! What would I come home to if I left them alone all day??? I'm going to go work for Caregivers of America. It'll be home health kind of stuff. A little over a dollar pay drop, but it won't be refrigerator temps...

Well, I was in another waiting room today. This time for myself. Routine blood work to check sugar levels and such. I had to wait because the nice lady had to call the other office for the paperwork and orders. While I was waiting I read part of an article on the presidential office, I wish I had more time to have read it all because it was an interesting read. Sadly I don't even remember the name of the magazine. Anyway, it was about how much more the president has to deal with on a daily basis compared to earlier presidents. It has grown a lot in recent years. Just a few short years ago, we didn't even have a Homeland Security department to our government! It is a sign of our times, I think. Although I do wonder what has happened to the check and balance system our government was designed to have. We are so much busier than we used to be, and seldom achieve much of anything. I wish I was smart enough to design a solution for the president, and the one after that. Either the A...

So, I'm sitting here in a waiting room of the hospital while my Mom has a prodecure done. Been here since 10am, but they haven't told me they've started yet, so she's probably not even sedated yet! Hopefully this doctor will see something the others haven't and figure out how to help her. These UTI's are getting so old, and it's effected her quality of life. Not much else going on. I'm enjoying the books I just bought from Amazon.com I've read one Trek book, and will soon start another. I'm not sure what to make of the Heroes book...it was not what I was expecting. It's rather boring actually, like the Spider-man book. Too much talking or thinking, not enough action. Which I thought was odd for Spider-man. No where close to being ready for Christmas...no decorations up yet, although I only have one more gift to purchase. That is amazing in and of itself. Hope everyone's having a good day.

How do you explain to someone who doesn't write where the ideas come from? I really don't know. They just pop into my head I guess. Especially poems. A line will start circulating in my head, "behind dead eyes" for example...and when I start to concentrate on it, hopefully on paper so I don't forget it and lose it...the rest just flows. There are some days I struggle for that next line, sometimes months and years. But where I am at right now, not so much. I'll admit, sometimes my short stories come from dreams I've had. My entire novel was based on a dream I had where I was having an affair with a store owner and was kidnapped. LOL! Obviously once I started thinking about it and fictionalizing it, it became something else entirely. My two Star Trek fan fics were based on dreams I had...one where the praise and worship band from my old church was playing on the Enterprise (hilarious) and another where Deanna Troi was key in bringing down the Borg ...

Well, I'm going away for the weekend. Justin is stayin home. He has to work Saturday, which is good because he called off Monday and Tuesday...I had a good reason to, I was sick. He just wanted to...??? Who knows? My Aunt Norma is in a movie that her church made and I decided I wanted to see it. Mom should be here shortly to pick me up. It's just an overnighter, 3 hours away, but packing can be such a pain. I don't like anything I have picked out to wear for church tomorrow. I know no one cares what I look like, it's a matter of me liking how I look and being comfortable. Ah well, at least I'm feeling better physically. Hope everyone has a good weekend.

I can't belive that I'm sick again. I just had a cold a couple of weeks ago. Now I've got another one and this one includes my chest. If I'm going to get sick every time that it's 'that time' of the month, I might have to find a new job! Sad to say that's the biggest news in my life this weekend.

I should have known better. Really, I should have. I wrote a poem today, it's scheduled to be posted on my poetry site on the 15th. It was written inspired by a one-word prophetic word given to me by someone who was a friend at the time, and the memory that one-word word sparked. Good old Paigey. Our friendship did not end on good terms, though if she were honest, it was much needed and past due. We are both much healthier without each other. I was as much it the wrong when it came to the end...I was being a bitch...and so was she. She'll never admit it, she never could adit when she was wrong...unless you were someone important...but that is neither here nor there. I'm guessing that she's still as pissed at me as I am at here. I'll admit it. I can't think of her without still being angry. I know I should just let it go and forgive, so I don't become more bitter than I already am. Anyway, I sent this poem to her because I thought she'd appreciate knowng ...