Window Into My Reality

Prayers for Japan. Such a huge quake at 8.9. I watched some videos online and can't get over the devestation, both from the quake and from the resulting tsunami. And to think that waves reached as far as California and Hawaii from it as well. Of course, my mind working as it does, wonders how this will effect the world economy as well. May it not be bad. Wherever you are Mariko, I hope you are safe. Mariko is a Japanese lady that I went to college with briefly back in '94. Sadly I lost track of her, but I think of her from time to time. She was so sweet and trying to teach me her language. So was Cynthia, a Puerto Rican. This is no doubt one factor of why I was dubbed the coolest white person on campus. May the aftershocks be small.

Our loss is heaven's gain. I lost my Uncle Eddie last weekend. He was my mother's older and only brother. His funeral was last night, and I learned so much about him that I wish I'd had more time to get to know him. He was the type of man that you had no doubts what he believed, because he lived them. He was a true man of God. He was loved by all, because he loved by all. I want to be more like him, because he was like Jesus. We got in about 11:30pm last night, the funeral was in Syracuse NY about 2 or 2 1/2 hours from here, and we were back up by 5am because we had to work. I couldn't get any time off from work, aside from being let out early, because he wasn't immediate enough family (uncles don't count!! wth?!) AND they had to have proof that I was there and where it was etc. I don't know if that is company policy or just my supervisor not believing me. Whatever. So we're dog tired right now. Gonna relax for a while/

Sigh. What a long week that was. I'm so beat. Of course, it doesn't help that I didn't sleep at all well last night and because Justin had to go to work, the alarm went off too early this morning and it took me forever to get back to sleep. Wednesday was the longest day because we had that storm and a lot of people called in. They made us work a full day anyway. We were in our easy grades almost all day, which equals slow and boring and cold. Packing meat is cold work anyway, but when you're not pulling that much a off the line, it really gets to you more. Mom had a macroplastique done yesterday at the hospital. The doctor injected chemicals around the top of her urethra in the hopes to puff it up to stop the constant leaking. She'll know probably by tomorrow whethe it worked or not, the nurse said she shouldn't be upset at any leaking still because she has to give those parts time to settle down from being poked. I hope it works because if it doesn't...

So far, this weekend is nicer than last. Justin might be playing his Xbox, but at least he's responding when I talk to him! That was getting so old! Boys and their toys! He's been much more attentive since our talk, though. Not sure if we're doing anything, as in going out. Tempy wasn't home when I tried visiting last night, so maybe I'll go tonight if she's home, maybe. Justin's talked about going to visit a second cousin of his, and I'm not sure if I want to go. I kind of just want to stay home. It's not as cold as it was, but it's still winter! I have to get back to writing my short story. Not sure why I hit slack time with that. Trying not to drag it out as long as The Wheel of Time series! lol! I've been rereading the first book of the series, The Eye of the World . Remembering why I liked it in the first place. Lord only knows if I'll make through the other bazillion books in the series, I think there's something li...

I's tired. Yes, I know that's not proper English. But that's ok. Cuz it's the truth! lol! I was so pampered at the Daily, and we've had such short weeks at Carill recently that I don't know what it's like to work an 8 hours day! We put one in yesterday though and another today. Don't know about tomorrow yet. Justin wants us to start working even longer hours. To make our paycheck bigger of course. So that we can #1 catch up on rent, and #2save money. We have a goal, $3-6,000 so that on the off chance that his Xbox buddy comes through with the job offer, we can take it and move! We'll see. I was going to type more, but I think I'll wait. I want to go to bed soon, and maybe have some more sweet dreams....like the one I had the other night about taking a trup to France!!! I was so excited! I was going to get to wander around Paris and see the Eiffel Tower! I wasn't one bit concerned about not knowing the language! I'm still am...

In my last post I made a comment about how big girls don't cry is a lie. I got in 'trouble' at the last church I attended because of how much I wept. I was labeled "emotional". I was, and I am...and to this day I don't understand why this is a bad thing. I can think and reason with the best of them. I'm intelligent and witty and curious. The fact that I allow myself to express my emotions in a place that I thought was 'safe' because the presence of God was there...is apparently erroneous. No one ever asked why I was crying. They all assumed that every time was the same, that I was depressed. I cried for a variety of reasons. I was sad. I was glad. I was overwhelmed by His love. But like I said, no one ever asked. Let's see. Jesus wept...It wasn't even His grief He was weeping about, it was compassion for Mary and Martha and their grief. The psalmists lamented...mixed right in with their praise and worship. No one ever considered that I migh...

Sometimes I wonder why Yahoo allows comments on their stories. I'm all for the 1st Amendment, Freedom of Speech, Press, Religion, and Expression. I think it's great. But reading comment on Yahoo stories makes me think that there are some people out there who just shouldn't be expressing themselves online. It makes America looks ignorant. Not stupid. Ignorant. There's a difference. Stupid can be fixed...a little teaching, a little guidance, a little enlightenment...voila! Ignorant doesn't want to be fixed. They're happy with their sick dumb-ass opinions. It amazes me how quick grown adults are to trash someone else, even if it's an innocent child. I remember one story a while back about a little girl who was being teased about liking Star Wars by the boys at school. Apparently these boys either liked her or had never been told that sci-fi is for girls too. It upset the girl to the point of tears when her mom asked why she wanted to change her Star Wars lunch...